And so it begins...

He has started taking steps without support. Soon he will be able to walk. Thank you God for giving this child an able bodied life. I was thinking how with each passing day he is changing, learning new things that surprise me, and there at the door was a letter from the pre-school we applied for a couple of months ago. We are supposed to meet the principal next month for an interview (without Rishabh!!). Frankly, i think, pre-schools are a way out for parents to allow them to do their own thing. All they need to do is put on the table the money, and someone else will take care of your child's basic learnings and spare you the task which is not just a parent's privilege but its responsibility. How sad!  I so much want to be the one to teach him all that, for what i will teach, money would neither be the motive, nor will it be the desired incentive.

Pretty soon he will start responding both in actions and in words. I will have to do the dirty job of corrupting his tender mind and spirit with the understanding of mine and thine. I still have memories of my parents teaching me the dos and donts. I particularly remember the mine and thine chapter which began with don't give away your pencils and erasers to others. Unbelievable as it may be, i remember that i did not like it. I was still to grow up to have my own opinion to question it as i am doing now. But i do understand my parent's perspective. It is the dirty lesson, the necessary evil, which they may have taught me with a heavy heart as i will to him.. Which parent would want to strip its child away from righteousness?

....Papa

Hurt him..

I think the degree of pain magnifies with age when you are physically hurt.  Also, the thought that you are hurt freaks you out more and makes you feel as if you are in more pain. As a child grows to relate more to his surroundings, even though just about an year old, it falls, it bangs into things many times and feels the pain which he is not really able to take. But that phase is worst i feel for a child. For it is the child's first of the pains (which also builds its endurance). All the child can do his cry and take the pain. You can't do anything to take it away from your kid and protect him from the pain and it breaks your heart.

Something like this happened today. I did not notice that Rishu has been following me on his knees. I was closing the door of the other room to see that he does not get in there unattended and one of his little fingers (of the right hand) came under the door and twitched it and left a tiny bruise. Thank God for some good reason, i did not pull the door hard in the first place. Rishu did not bleed, but in a moment, his face turned in pain and he started crying. He may have been in so much pain as he was struggling for to voice it with his cry scream. He looked so vulnerable as was moaning uncontrollably, that i instantly had tears in my eyes. Later in the day i was thinking, what happened to me?! Would i have tears in my eyes if it were somebody else's baby? May be not. It was not me who carried him for months in my belly. Then what happened? I hope there is no scientific explanation for that which could be defined as a chemical release in the brain. But whatever it is, the feeling is beautiful..... 

Papa..